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A Question of Sacrifice

by Angela Counsel

 

Working Mum Balance low resI speak to many women in business about work life balance and my main message to them is that there is no such thing as perfect work life balance. We are just stressing ourselves out trying to achieve it.

To me having perfect work life balance means that there is complete equality in the energy between your business and your family, and this just can’t happen.

Being a Mum in business there are times when you have to sacrifice family time for your business.  Other times you sacrifice your business for your family.  These sacrifices change depending on the stage of your business and the age of your children.  If your business is in the start- up phase (generally first 5 years) you will likely have to sacrifice some family time to grow your business.

I remember hearing Suzy Jacobs founder of She Business speak about the sacrifices that she had to make when she was starting up and building her business.  Suzy openly speaks about the fact that she wasn’t available for her children as much as she would have liked during this early phase of her business.  But Suzy had a big picture she know what she was working for with her business and her family.

Now that She Business is larger and more established and Suzy’s children are getting older, she knows that she can take a step back from her business to be available to her children.  To do this Suzy had a vision and goals, she knew that building a successful business took energy but now she is able to enjoy the rewards that her business gives her.

So how do you get over the guilt when you put your business before your family?

  • Make sure you have a bigger picture, a reason why you are doing what you are doing.
  • Accept that you might not always be there for your children, but they do have other people around them who love them and give them the support they need.
  • Know that the times you choose your business over your children, is only for a relatively short amount of time.
  • When you are with your children be ‘present’ and most importantly just ditch the guilt!  Guilt is a wasted emotion and if you are doing something that you are passionate about there is no need to feel guilty.

In the end if you feel the sacrifice is too much, then this might be the time to put your business on hold for a while.  If you have built a business that doesn’t rely totally on you then you will find it easier to step out. If not, find a way to change your business to suit your family circumstances.  This is where working with a coach or mentor can help you to work out what is important to you and how you can re-structure your business to suit you.

 

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